I’m bleeding.  The dark circles around my once radiant n mesmerising (hahahahaha) eyes, hv now grown roots.  Look into them n all u’ll see r shadows screaming, “I’m so tired, I wanna cry!”  My once sexy (hahahaha again!) back is hunched fr persistent exhaustion n physical stress (I still can’t resist my 40pounders calling “mama, carry me..”). 

In exactly 2 mths time, I hv to sit for my Marketing n Stragetic Planning papers.  But I think, I’m gonna hv to defer SP; cos I bor lat (no energy). 

My typical weekday routine is this:  reach home by X.XXpm.  Switch on d air purifier/aircond, put d kettle under d tap, do d laundry while d tap is running, come back put d kettle on, vacuum n wipe dust around d hse, pour d boiled water into d flask, take shower, go downstairs pick up kids fr sitters, do homework n play with them, hang d laundry while they play with toys, fold dried laundry, time for kids’ poo poo time, wipe pet pet, wash clean clean, wash baby bottles n water tumblers, make milk for kids, chg them into pyjamas, n put them to bed.  Note: “put them to bed” is not like in movies where d parents say, "goodnite darling", switch off d lights n close d door behind 'em.  With David n Michael, I hv to lie down with them, let them hold each of my hands.  I am not allowed to leave until they r asleep - which takes up to an hour.  (I know I’m supposed to train them to sleep on their own, but nvrmind lah, I know for a fact that with boys, this clinginess won’t last for long.  Truth is, I love feeling close to them too - while they still let me...)

So by d time, they’re asleep, it’s usually abt 10.30-11pm. I pick up my books, eyes staring at d loads n loads of words n diagrams……… but d brain oredy VERY DEAD.  I read pages n pages.  But ask me what I read, I go – “wha?!!”

The only times I can really absorb what I’m reading is when I come to d office in d wkends to do some intense data entry (fr book to brain), w/o any distractions.  That oso, after I’ve bathed d kids, played with them, feed them lunch, n leave at jes abt their afternoon nap time.  But my other problem is, d PC beside me, beckons like Pamela Anderson to d average guy, “chk me out, come”.  And once I open up my email, up to a couple of hours of office related work ensues. 

Distractions, distractions!

I need help!

Don’t ask me to get a maid, cos I hv no where to put her during wkdays when no one’s home.  N there’s not that much of hsework i can delegate anyways.  N maids oso cannot be used to help with the “Playing n bonding with kids” part too – most definitely. 

Jes tell me, if u can… suggest what kind of supplements I shd take to help improve d efficiency, memory n alertness of my brain/mind.  Or whatever smart tips u can offer….  I jes need d “boost” for another 8mths (when I finish all papers) – if I’m lucky.

Come, come.  Fire away ur bright ideas!  Help me!  URGENT!!